Kids Say

Oh my goodness! It's been 6 months since I've done one of these! I have got to get better at writing things down and posting more often. I feel like their vocabulary has already changed so much since some of these were noted; especially Emilia. Oh well!

Here's the last Kids Say post for more funnies: https://reneekimber.blogspot.com/search/label/Kids%20Say

E: WAIT! MY BOOGERS!
*Translation: Wait! Don't forget my stuffed cougars!

D: Mommy, can you buy some more kretzels? (pretzels)

D: Emilia's poop smells like Oma's breath!
*For the record, I have not noticed this phenomenon hahaha

D: I'm playing with skabetti (spaghetti)

D playing train (set up chairs in kitchen): ALL AHOOOOOORN! 
*instead of All Aboard!

From Ashleigh at preschool:
Singing the good morning song at circle.
Dom in absolute excitement: A****, your singing voice is SO beautiful!
A**** turns her whole body and sings, "THANK YOU DOMINIC!!!
This is the stuff Disney movies are made of. 

Dom shows me something he picked up with tweezers.
Me: Oh wowsers!
D: No. They're tweezers.

I'm curling my hair for a date night
D: Oh mommy, you look like a princess!

D in a goofy manly voice: I'm going to work with my moustache!

D: Hey Mommy! Chest and chestnut and chipmunk makes a rhyme!

D in a BIG voice: Oh ho hooooo. I am PUMBAA! I am a HEDGEHOG!

E: Me want to watch a shoowwwww
D: No, I don't want to watch a show. I want to play!
E: *whining*
D: I know it's hard to wait. That's okay. We are not going to watch a show

(Love seeing them put the @BigLittleFeelings scripts that we practice to work!)

Emilia singing what she thinks is the paw patrol theme song: Paw patrol, paw patrol, BMW!

(Should be "Paw patrol, paw patrol, be there on the double!"

Me explaining the Christmas story to Dom

D: GUACAMOLE!
Me: What? Guacamole?
D: Yes. I want you to find the God book with guacamole. 
Me: .... the Storybook Bible?
D: Yes
I get and give him the storybook Bible.

Me: So... can you tell me what is guacamole?
D: It's this big giant guy!
Me holding my composure: Hmm... *opens book to story about David and Goliath

D: Yes! That's guacamole!!

Ashleigh at Circle at preschool: Dom, these kids are so delicious, they can't escape me!
D: These kids are not delicious. They are extra strong with the force!!

Dom unwrapping a garbage truck colouring book at Christmas: THIS IS JUST WHAT I ORDERED!

Christmas morning and I go sit between the kids on the couch.
E: Mommy, you leave us alone? 
Me: You want me to leave you alone? Why?
E: Because. You in us space.
Well alrighty! Merry Christmas to you too! Haha

Actual first words from Dom on his 4th birthday morning: Sometimes I fart when I'm having a birthday. 

D: How do we get to heaven when we die? 
Me: Hmm. I don't really know. What do you think?

D: Maybe we go in an airplane.

E: *Whining and asking for something. A song or specific toy or something*

Me: *Making dinner and doing dishes and not responding*
D from the couch reading a cookbook: I hear what you're saying Emilia, but not right now because we're going to have dinner soon. 

Me: Sorry Dom, I couldn't bring up all your cars because I didn't have enough hands.

D: But if you were an alien you could, because then you'd have lots of hands!

Overheard from upstairs (where Dom & Emilia were playing together)

E: Umm... Boba Fett. Umm... Jango Fett. Umm... OH! Admiral Ackbar! Umm... General Grievous. Uhh... Bib Fortuna!

*These kids know more Star Wars characters than I do*

Me: Emilia, are you ready to get dressed or do you have to pee still?

E: Ya. Let me see if I have pee left still in my pee hole

Dom and I discussing life with a new baby...

D: What do babies do?
Me: Well, baby will be so little. We can hold baby, he or she will cry when they're hungry or have a wet diaper. So daddy and mommy will change them or get them some milk or...
D interrupts loudly: HEY! YOU HAVE MILK IN YOUR BOOBIES!

I'm sitting on the exercise ball.

E: Me want to sit on it!
Me: Oh, I am just sitting because it helps my hips because baby ispulling on my body!

E: Well... MY baby is pulling on my... Bones!

Me: Emilia, we need to pick out some Valentines to give to your friends at preschool on Thursday. Dominic picked the Star Wars ones. There are also Paw Patrol, Frozen 2...

D: Trolls!
Me: Ya, Trolls...

E: Maybe Billy Goats Gruff?!

*What?!?! That is so so random!*

The kids are playing "Christmas" so Dom has put some toys in a bag under the "tree" (table) for Emilia. He's trying to give her clues to the gift. 

D: So... It MIGHT be embarrassing....

D: Mommy, why are your boobies big? 

Me: So that they can make milk for the baby!
E: When my boobs big, my boobs will make... choooooocolate!

D: If I pretend I have boobs, my boobs will only make flat things. Like pancakes and waffles!

Overheard while they play in the tub...

D: Okay. This one over here is the tongue paste. I am brushing somebody's tongue.

D notices our smoke detector is crooked and very dramatically states: Our smoke protector has been like that for FIFTY-FOUR YEARS!

*I love that he still calls it a smoke protector*

D describing his head cold: It's like the back of my nose is trying to explode. 

D: Emilia! This is all driving me nuts!

D pointing to wrapping paper: Daddy, what's this big scroll for?
Dave: Did you just call it a scroll?!

D realizing he's going to have to play hockey alone: Okay... the middle of my penis can be the referree!!!

We are getting ready to go outside in the rain/mud...

Me: Emilia, let's go get your muddy buddy on.

E: Me going to be a dirty bastard!

*This is what @GoCleanCo followers are called, but there's no way Emilia would have heard/repeated that. We never did figure out what she was actually saying haha. I have a video recording of it because it is impossible to hear anything other than Dirty Bastard.

E: Me want yogurt!
Me: I'd like you to finish your oatmeal first

E: Oh my tummy is too full!
Me: I guess it's too full for yogurt then too!

E: ... Oh. My baby will make space for yogurt!!!

*This girl has some sort of sneaky answer/response for everything*

D: Mommy, your tummy is even bigger than Opa's!

Me bringing Emilia up for bath time...

E: But Mommy, Dom's not cominggggggg!

D: Oh, don't fret about me!

E: Is baby excited to come out?

Me: I think so. Hopefully!

E: Ahh. Me just want to hold her hand!!

Someone (can't remember who): Dom, where is your Mommy's baby?

D: In her uterus?

That's my boy! Haha

And their current favorite thing to say: Uncle Toot! They love to give their uncles and aunts silly nicknames like Uncle Dump and Uncle Toot! They have also nicknamed Phoebe - Phoebe Jeebies. Myles has so far just gotten "Myles Smiles". Dom's rhyme game has picked up big time, so I'm sure he'll come up with something goofier and more potty-related eventually.